08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004 09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004 10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004 12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005 02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005 03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005 04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005 05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005 07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005 08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005 09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005 10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005 11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005 12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006 01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006 02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006 03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006 04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006 05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006 06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006 07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006 08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006 09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006 10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006 11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006 12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007 01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007 02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007 03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007 04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007 05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007 06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007 07/01/2007 - 08/01/2007 08/01/2007 - 09/01/2007 09/01/2007 - 10/01/2007 10/01/2007 - 11/01/2007 11/01/2007 - 12/01/2007 12/01/2007 - 01/01/2008 01/01/2008 - 02/01/2008 02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008 03/01/2008 - 04/01/2008 04/01/2008 - 05/01/2008 05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008 06/01/2008 - 07/01/2008 07/01/2008 - 08/01/2008 08/01/2008 - 09/01/2008 09/01/2008 - 10/01/2008 10/01/2008 - 11/01/2008 11/01/2008 - 12/01/2008 12/01/2008 - 01/01/2009 01/01/2009 - 02/01/2009 02/01/2009 - 03/01/2009 03/01/2009 - 04/01/2009 04/01/2009 - 05/01/2009 05/01/2009 - 06/01/2009 06/01/2009 - 07/01/2009 07/01/2009 - 08/01/2009 09/01/2009 - 10/01/2009 10/01/2009 - 11/01/2009 11/01/2009 - 12/01/2009 12/01/2009 - 01/01/2010 01/01/2010 - 02/01/2010 04/01/2010 - 05/01/2010 05/01/2010 - 06/01/2010 07/01/2010 - 08/01/2010 08/01/2010 - 09/01/2010 09/01/2010 - 10/01/2010 10/01/2010 - 11/01/2010 11/01/2010 - 12/01/2010 12/01/2010 - 01/01/2011 01/01/2011 - 02/01/2011 02/01/2011 - 03/01/2011 03/01/2011 - 04/01/2011 04/01/2011 - 05/01/2011 05/01/2011 - 06/01/2011 06/01/2011 - 07/01/2011 07/01/2011 - 08/01/2011 08/01/2011 - 09/01/2011 09/01/2011 - 10/01/2011 10/01/2011 - 11/01/2011 12/01/2011 - 01/01/2012 07/01/2012 - 08/01/2012 08/01/2012 - 09/01/2012 12/01/2012 - 01/01/2013

i don't know..

tests finally are over.. ain't happy at all.. nv felt any happiness in it...

i am tired.. very tired actually.. i'm sick of planning everything and holding everyone together.. i dun haf the energy to do so anymore.. i'm seriously drained out...

who says i'm not worried about not completing the project? who says i'm not concerned? u're taken for granted? i am too.. i am just like a rubber band stretched so far that i'm breaking apart soon.. so stressful and such torture is real hard for one to bear..

losing all my energy day by day.. trying so hard to pull myself together.. asking and begging myself to be strong.. but how can i do that without any motivation from ppl around me?

stress is maximising and building in me.. be it in school or at home... dunno how to deal with it... really dunno..

Test like no tmr..

today is the end of my 2nd test paper and i feel like cursing and swearing (although i did that right after my paper, i still do now). feel so disappointed with the papers(both ERM and BI), feel damn sucky about the questions and the scope being covered in the tests. i just can't find one word to describe that feeling i had when i saw the paper. for the first time, i really felt that i'm in deep shit and i fear what's awaiting for me.

i guess none of us expected that this kind of questions will appear in the tests. really don't want to mess up my last semester and leave the school with average grades. i just can't take it, maybe it's my pride or even my ego that i never like the feeling of losing. defeat is a very harsh word in my dictionary. i wan to leave this school with results that i really strive hard to achieve and it looks EXCELLENT not something which is AVERAGE. i need the results to get into Uni, though i know it is damn hard to get a diploma with merit.

this semester is really too short for us as everything is too compressed and it's really hard to follow the expected pace. i could hardly remember when was the last time i had splet for more than 8 hours. eversince school started it's just school and school and school.

ain't really glad that chinese new year is approaching coz i don't feel a slight happiness in the season especially when datelines are soooooooo near. i guess i'll be floating around when the deadlines approach me and it's not the line that is dead it's me.

i really need to runaway, HOLIDAY~~~~~ i need it.. anywhere will do, someone just bring me out from this place!

feel like sheet now......

ain't feeling very good now for 2 reasons: my head is aching and suffering the aftermath from the quarreling with my bro. family has a lot of things going on and haf no idea how to convey my feelings and thoughts to my friends so i choose to bottle up everything. bad choice..

reason for the quarrel with my bro is regarding something very expensive and i have no idea how dumb a man (why yes, here means MAN not human) can be. all of a sudden, i resent men who are stupid, dumb and do things without using their brains. what is ur brain for? to think how to perform better when u're engage in sex? come on, there's surely something better for u to use the BRAIN for. having this type of behaviour really makes my blood boils. i'm trying to maintain gd relationships with you but YOU take us for granted. our mother does not owe u anything in your past lifes, so stop torturing our lifes. you just makes my life miserable once and again. i thought the adult issues are gone and here you are inviting new problems. should i congratulate u and make a banner to welcome you? grow up and please use YOUR head to think before you act. haiz...

really in a very bad mood this week, suddenly things just change. i hate irresponsible men~!~!~ ARGH~~~~~~~ stop agitating me~~~~~~~~~

Happy Bdae Kat!

Happy Bdae Kat!

i guess all of us had a wonderful time at your bbq, though nt the carrying of stuff to the beach bcoz that left me muscle ache. -_-" anyway, hope u like the presents that me, lin, shu and billy bought for u, kinda had a hard time searching for suitable presents hehe...

setup the bbq fire by myself, so sad~ no one is there to help me set up the fire except blocking the wind and "dig" charcoals. haha.. so sad leh me alone setting up fire.. anyway, as usual i'm the one bbq-ing with the help of lin. think i just can't skip this bcoz i really wouldn't want to eat burnt food. haha...

reached home at about 3am, i guess it's the 3rd week that i reached home at this kind of timing. first week is x'mas then new year den kat's bdae bbq. no wonder i'm feeling tired, hahaha~


the flu bug is here to find me again after so many months, but glad that it's not that terrible though feel kinda weak. think it's because it's quite cold at the beach ytd. but at least we are able to do some distressing.

oh yah before i forget, it's not only muscle ache that i brought home, i've brought home a lot of mosquitoe bites ALSO. :P

Haiz.. i don't want to know..

Something is really wrong with my blog, can't compose new entires using the Compose tab instead i have to type my blog using the Edit HTML tag.

I need more time~~~~

everything seems so packed and i'm only have 24hrs to work. i seriously need 36hrs per day to do my stuff. it would be so gd if one doesn't need to sleep or rest. there's simply too much things to be completed in such a short period of time. haiz.. need serious help here..

below is something i need to say but i don't wish to explain much, so just let me talk because i find it so hard to say it verbally..

keep Adult issues out of my sight~! i know i'm reaching 21 soon and i'm treated as a adult under Singapore laws but i don't want to know anything about those issues. they simply just irritates me and make my day bad. you come to me in the middle of the night and told me what happened. i know something was amiss the previous day when i got home an di also knew things are terribly wrong the moment i stepped into the house yesterday. HOWEVER, i do not wish to know and keep me out of it. it simply turns me away when i think what's awaiting for me at home and seriously it's the first time since so many years that i do not wish to go home. so please, you should know what to do because you denied everything when i disapproved about that years ago. and you should know how badly i had disapproved and how difficult it is for me to adapt. so kindly give me a way out by giving me more space to breathe and it's my final semester don't mess with my life!

haiz.. my mood is fully destroyed by that issue, so i guess that is why i'm so "emotional" this few days. please someone solve that issue and return my life to me.

Happy 2005!

2004 ended in a tragedy and 2005 started in a mournful atmosphere. i think this is the first time a new year started out like this.

had a very exciting celebration for the new year. went to xris hse for the count down along with kat, billy, shu and lydia. before doing to xris hse, we went to tampines central to do some groceries shopping and to check out my heels~ sad to say, i'm not fated with that heels coz the size that i wanted for the colour is out of stock. so i left my name on the reservation list, die die also wan the heels hehe.. took cab to xris hse bcoz if the unpredictable weather.

started off the celebration by playing mahjong, think i've played too much mahjong becoz i've just played last week. den dinner is served! spagetti with lots of cheese~~ hehe.. very tasty dinner and something proper coz haf been camping in sch and i'm so sick of the food there. den we decided to finish the remaining rounds of the mahjong session before we change to another game whereby we can involve everyone.

played this lame game whereby everyone will have to draw a card from the stack of poker cards and stick it to their own forehead. everyone is allowed to c the card except for urslf. depending on how confident u r of ur card, u'll add in dif drinks ranging from red wine, party wine, beer, orange juice, tea and coca-cola to the glass where the person with the smallest card would have to drink. played murderer also and i think we are very amused by our expressions coz we r spending more time laughing instead of killing innocents and get caught by police. haha..

after that is the most silly game: heart attack. i guess it is the most silent version of heart attack i've ever played. as usual we r spending more time laughing den playing. those who lost 3 rounds would have to drink a glass of unchilled beer. wouldn't wan to described how it taste like coz i'm the final winner. hehe..

den decided to fry the snacks we bought earlier and dunno for how many months, i'm in the kitchen cooking. i think my mom will be damn amazed coz she always think that her daughter only know how to cook instant noodles. hehe.. mother, i've watched u cook ok! hahaha.. anyway, it is then where billy is going arnd with 2 glasses and a bottle of beer to ask ppl to toast with him. in the end he got drunk. -_-" so did kat, from their abnormal behaviour u'll know how terrible it was.

some small matters happened inbetween and wat i wan to say is: hey gals, don't every think that u're dumb or stupid. no matter wat u did or wat happened we as friends will always luv u as who u r.

we continue the celebration with something really cannot make it and i've really no comments about it. hehe. can only say it's so cannot make it and lame.

anyway, happy 2005 to all my friends especially to leen, na n la. guess we can only meet up after this semester, hoping to c u gals in sch~